Mike (okazu) wrote in cadavre_exquis,
Mike
okazu
cadavre_exquis

just fantastic

the cat quietly ran across the fence and jumped down into the narrow street. it was in its mouth. i couldn't believe it. it wasn't shiny, it wasn't edible, it wasn't like anything i had ever seen one of the damn things play with--why did it want it? i followed its white blur with my eyes as it snaked down the alley behind my flat and disappeared into god-knows-where. what was i going to tell her when she knocked on the door (exactly seven times; never more, never less) now? i lit a cigarette and slumped onto the loveseat where she and i hadn't sat for a very long time.
knocking.
one-two-three-four-five-six-seven.
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Now what? I found a million thoughts raging through my head... if the door opens, then what? What if I can't handle seeing her? I stood there, frozen like a deer in the headlights, for what seemed an eternity, just holding my breath and wondering what would happen next. When I realized there was no answer, I was disappointed. I looked at the door one last time before I turned to walk away. But something kept me there. Something inside was tearing at me, wouldn't let me leave. That's when I realized it...I wasn't alone there on the porch. I could feel the icy stare on the back of my neck. Slowly, I turned to my right to find her sitting just beyond the shadow, motionless, her gaze fixed on me. There was something deathly familiar in her expression and all I could see were her eyes, glowing green. Silently and effortlessly she rose and moved towards me. Not a word spoken until her frigid hand was upon mine. "I've been waiting for you."
She had something for me. The yellow rubber duckie I had left at her place last year. I thought, "Hey, I'd forgotten about that little fucker!" But she was here for more than that. She handed the bath-toy to me and winked. Instead of putting it in my front pocket for later, I decided to use its mind-expanding powers now.

"Did I ever show you how to use this?"

"No," she sensuously breathed.

"Well, you place the lil thang on ya hed. Balanced right on the crown. Soon you should be experiencing the effects. Feel it?"

Her demeanor animated pretty quickly. "Ya, it's like I'm back on the farm! And all the kids are there: Yoseph, Taballa, Cletus and Slowride! I can hear their thoughts...."
she closed her eyes and began mouthing their words. Slowride and Cletus (as usual) weren't thinking much, but her eyes began to tear up as she heard Yoseph and Taballa - they were thinking about making breakfast. she began to repeat their little words out loud for me to hear, "....hould use that can of sweet pepper jelly in the basement. It's been there longer than we have!"
Oh SHIT.
I knocked the duckie off her head. It floated in the air about six inches from my left temple.
"What the hell did you do that for?" she asked, her dark hair falling fetchingly over one eye, a few strands hanging on to her lower lip for dear life.
"You don't understand!" I shouted. "If they open that can of sweet pepper jelly, the world will end. We have to stop them!!"
Her eyes widened in surprise, "I had no idea the powers of this sucker! I mean, they sell 'em at walmart. Do they know about this?"
"They? They who?" I ask with only a hint of irony as I quickly run upstairs to grab my cape. I mean, duh, crimefighting ... cape ... they go together.
When I reached my room and entered my walk-in closet, I was dumbfounded. There, to my dismay, I found my glorious gold la'me cape torn to shreds! I looked around, shaking in utter disbelief. That's when I noticed the rat dropping, leading to the window sill. Criminy! It was no one else but Ratt Boy! That deirty scoundrel...
Damn! All I needed was to make another stop...as if time wasn't short enough. And now I had to stop and include Kitty Kitty in our plans. (That self centered cat never did anything without the proper motivation. Might should pick up some catnip too.) Oh well, if I couldn't wear my sparkly gold la'me cape, then I would have to settle for my silver one. It doesn't really match my outifit, but when your fighting crime, you have to be apropriately dressed. No one fears a non-caped crusader.

While I was strapping on my cape, she came up the stairs and stood watching me. As I turned to see her,I was shocked to see that she had decided to come with me, but not just that. It was like old times when I realized what she was wearing. I couldn't believe she'd saved it after all these...days. We'd only had to go rescue someone last thursday. But still. There she was in her black leather, high heels and fish nets with the whip at herside. It was just me and...the dominatrix kidd. "Holy smoking pants, Duckman!" That's when I realized it. My pants were smoking and full of holes.
so it's already begun like it almost happened before, i'm burning from the inside out. the world so nearly escaped me last time the jelly was opened, the jelly my grandma had finished canning when i uttered my first screams and she came running through the house to find that i was the only survivor of my birth. my mother in a state undescribable and the walls of the bedroom charcoal black...